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Jim James







About my stay at FSB (Florida School for Boys)

I don't remember the date I went to Marianna, but it was around 1959-1960.

My cottage was Monroe it was cottage number #9, I think. The grounds looked nice when I got there. Everything was so neat and clean, but I soon found out that the place was worse than anything I could imagine. It has been 50 years; some of the details are hard to remember although some things that happened to me there I will never forget. In fact it would be impossible to forget these things.

I am going to keep this fairly simple for now. I can elaborate my complete story at a later time.

After arriving I with other boys went to the doctor at Marianna to have a physical. The main thing I remember was that all of us boys stood next to each other while the doctor walked along and examined our genitals. He made sexual comments about the size or our privates and how we would use them in life and if yours was big he would say something like you are a lucky boy and then to some others he would say well, you are not so lucky and made jokes about it. This was very embarrassing. Well enough about that. I also remember going to the shrink there. He asked a lot of questions but keep coming back to the question did I masturbate. I did not want to talk about that but he insisted so I said no.

I also for some reason went to a doctor on campus that attached wires to my head and did some sort of test on a machine that looked like an electro device with a lot of lines being drawn. I went back to him for this test multiple times. I remember the boys teasing me about going to the nut doctor or something like that.

I was also sent to the dentist office there. I didn't know why because my teeth were in good shape at that age. I asked him if he was the dentist, he told me that he was a trainee and was learning. It was very painful and they drilled out many teeth and filled them. I am talking about like 15 teeth over the course of about 4 visits. Later in my life as I grew older I suffered a lot with my teeth. I don't think he really knew what he was doing. My teeth kept getting infected and rotting over the years and I had to have all the teeth that were filled removed. I suffered with my teeth all my life really. I had to have six of them removed at one time that he had filled , and eventually all of the ones that were filled had to be removed.

I just didn't know what they were going to ask me next or do to me and was really living in fear. I and another boy began talking about running away from that place. He also was scared and wanted to get out of there. I never knew how they found out, but they did. Then came the real night of horror when I was woke up very late at night in my bed and told come with me boy.I was scared to death because I had heard what the other boys said about going to the White House and I knew that this would be the only reason they would get me out of my bed late at night. I was taken outside to the state car and told to get in. I remember asking why I was being taken. They said to shut my damn mouth and that I would find out soon enough. Well he was right I did find out. They took me to the White House it was near the kitchen. They opened the door and I remember them telling me to sit there and shut my damn mouth and not to say a word. I tried to tell them that I was only talking about it and was really not going to run. A tall man grabbed me by my shirt and told me to shut my fucking mouth or I would get it even worse. It smelled very foul in that place; it was filthy and looked like a dungeon to me. They turned on a huge fan it began to whirl around. It was very loud and you could smell the mildew and stink in that place. I was literally shaking so bad I could not sit still. I could not control myself, I was scared to death. Then the one armed man told me to come with him. I saw an old bed on a metal frame. He said to lay down on it and grab the rail in front of it. I said please sir I really didn't mean to run away and that I would never talk about it again. Then he said boy shut your fucking mouth or you will get it even worse, so I just laid there and waited for what I knew was coming. I remember my body was shaking and I just bit onto the nasty pillow and tightened up my whole body and held the bed rail tight. OMG then it came. He hit me so hard the bed almost seemed as it bounced off the floor. I had never felt pain like that in my life. I just wanted to get out of there. I jumped off the bed and pleaded with him not hit me again. He said now you are going to get it even worse and to get back on that goddamn bed NOW! I did get back on the bed and he hit me again. I could feel the power of this man. He was unbelievably strong. I came off the bed again and told him that was all I could take. I actually felt as if he were going to beat me to death. He said you little son of a bitch you are really going to get it now! Then he told the other man to go to the kitchen and get some kitchen boys to hold me down. I heard them coming into the White House. Then he said now one more chance. Grab that fucking bed rail and turn your head toward the wall and do not move off that fucking bed again. I knew there was nothing I could do. I knew I was going to get it even worse now so I obeyed him and then the beating began for sure this time. I was screaming and he felt no sympathy. The pain was indescribable. He just kept hitting me all over my back, butt and legs. I became numb to a certain extent. Then it was over.

About 80 plus times he hit me as I can remember. I remember looking at him after. He was sweating. I could hardly walk. I felt as though the back half of my body was numb. I was taken back to the cottage and warned to mind my own fucking business and keep my mouth shut or I would be going back to the white house. I said nothing and would not look at him. I swore to myself that someday I would come back and blow up that damn place; the White House and for that one armed man well……..I to this day hope he burns in hell! We all know his name. I was taken back to my bed and I laid there trembling almost all night. In the morning I went to the bathroom and found I could not get my pajamas off. They were stuck to me and I could not get my top off either. A boy in the dorm helped me. We had to wet the pajamas to get them off me. They were stuck in my skin and had to be picked out. When I looked at myself in the mirror I was totally black on the back half of my body and the skin was broken all over. It still was bleeding a little after taking the pajamas off.

Then in a couple of weeks I woke up and noticed like boils all over my legs. They had puss heads and were huge. They took me to the infirmary and was treated. After about a week they went away. I think that they were a bad infection because of the beating.

OK there is more I can tell, but enough for now. I hope that someday the people who did these things will pay!

My life after Marianna well that’s another story.

Sincerely,

Jim James Doubletrouble745@aol.com